I had never been to Australia before. So when my best friend decided to get married there I figured it was time for a trip. I couldn’t really say no anyway as she asked me to be her maid of honour. I was so excited. I pictured myself sunning on the beautiful beaches of Brisbane, popping to dress fittings here and there and exploring all that Australia has to offer, especially the men and the wine! In reality the trip was nothing like this. I arrived and was immediately ferried to Aunt May’s house and put on tree removal duty. That’s right I had to organise tree removal. Melbourne is as foreign to me as Timbuktu so this was a pretty steep task to begin with on day one as I battled with insane jet lag.
Apparently the entire families of both bride and groom were tied up organising last minute details for the rehearsal and didn’t have time to arrange the removal of Aunt May’s poisonous tree. Why is this important to the wedding I hear you ask? Well Aunt May is hosting many international guests who are attending and they are expecting a 5* experience, apparently a rotting old tree does not fit in with the image. There I am, bikini clad, in Aunt May’s overgrown garden calling up a bunch of arborists in Melbourne. I found the man for the job. His company had years of experience in all things tree trimming, Melbourne has never looked so good as when they are done with their chain saw’s apparently. I told them to come over as soon as possible as I had a date with the beach. While my tanning may have been delayed at least I did get to experience a little of Australia’s male talent in the form of a strapping and talented tree surgeon. They managed to get the job done super quickly and the garden did look great. I told the bridal party that it would take all day and they should just leave me to it at the house so I could escape to the beach for some sunny freedom.