For me, living in Australia and heading into the new year means exactly two things. Firstly, the start of a diet that’s going to change everything. Secondly, the obligatory trip to Canberra. While the first of these two things symbolises an exciting dream for the future and a resolution to reach my greatest potential, the second is the exact opposite. The family trip to Perth is nothing but monotonous, stressful, and even, sometimes, outright painful. I’m not kidding. Once when we were out there, I fell down a cliff, but that’s a story for another time. The family trip to Perth is an archaic venture, reminiscent of blind childhood to parental instruction. Being the strong, mature woman that I am today, such a family trip should no longer be necessary. However, no matter how many times I try and phrase that argument to my parents, I’m still forced along.
Perhaps the worst aspect of the trip is their house, which is right on the beach, is that it doesn’t have any air conditioning. Canberra is a hot, costal city, you’d think that any house out there would have to have air con. I know that here, an air con-less house is basically a death sentence.
Every year since I can remember, we’ve spent sleepless, sweat-filled nights lying in beds without sheets on and wet flannels over our faces. It’s like some prolonged form of torture.
When I asked my aunt and uncle, who are the reason we have to go to the other side of the country once a year, why they didn’t have air conditioning, they explained that they did, it was just broken. Apparently, it’s been broken since the day they moved in, more than twenty-five years ago. So the solution to this problem is simple. All they have to do is get air conditioning services, Canberra doesn’t appear to done with the hot weather. Soon as the air con is fixed all will be right with the world again. I can’t wait for this to be over. Done. Fixed. You’re welcome.